Austin Journal (part 7)

How I Spent My Austin Vacation by Steve Barr, AFF newbie Part The Seventh


Friday, October 21, 2005

Woke up bright and early (well, early), looking forward to a full day of panels and round tables and beer. And caffeine. Beautiful, beautiful caffeine.

Luckily, the festival organizers (bless their hearts) had arranged to have representatives from the fine beverage company Red Bull at the festival, and they circulated among the surly, sleep-deprived festival-goers, blessing us with gifts of supercaffeinated sugarwater like nectar of the gods.

Now bright-eyed and bushy-tailed (in an artificial, chemically-induced kind of way), I hied meself to the 9:00 panel - How To Break Into The Business. The panelists were David Boxerbaum, Carey Nelson Burch, Garth Pappas, and Tai Duncan (three lit agents and a creative exec, respectively).

(Tai Duncan (who is a boy) was mysteriously absent, however, so it was all-agents, all the time!)

In a way, this panel was a rehash of the How To Get The Most Out Of The Festival panel from the previous day. ("Don't be an asshole.") Lots of information on what *not* to do, but not a lot of concrete advice on things we *should* do (other than, of course, write kickass scripts).

I would have been surprised, though, if they had been able to give us a roadmap to success. This industry doesn't work that way. Most people who fail, fail the same way; but everyone who succeeds does so by a different path.

They did give a lot of useful information on how we can improve our chances, but those points have all been covered on this fine website several times over the last few years, so I won't take up more bandwidth here.

The next panel was a "craft" panel as opposed to a business one. Three badass action/suspense writers talked about How To Write Action/Suspense. This panel was worth it, just to be in the same room as Ted Tally (SILENCE OF THE LAMBS), Shane Black (the LETHAL WEAPONS, KISS KISS BANG BANG), and Howard Gordon (writer/producer of "24"). It was moderated by Barry Josephson, who used to be Prez of Production at Columbia, and who has since gone indie-prod.

There seemed to be a lot of collegial respect among the panelists, and some of the best stuff was when they just bullshitted with each other. It was a Q&A type deal, but many of the best questions were asked from one panelist to another, as opposed to the questions like "When are you supposed you use ALLCAPS?" and suchlike that came from the audience.

One big thing I noticed (having read a lot Tally and Black's work, and a few "24" scripts (though I don't know if Gordon wrote those particular ones)) was how *different* their writing styles are. The only thing all three of them share in common is that their writing "reads" like a movie. It makes the reader visualize a cinematic experience in his head. All three of them use different tools to achieve that kind of effect, that that's what they're all aiming for.

By the end of the panel, my third Red Bull was starting to wear off. Luckily, it was time for the Wordplay lunch organized by Susan Bays.

About 25 WPers met in the lobby of the Driskill and caravanned to a Southern-comfort-food restaurant called Threadgill's, which is apparently an incubator and launching pad for lots of famous musicians. I was shocked and thankful to discover that they had items on the menu other than meat, but somehow I ended up with a lunch that was mostly cheese. Mmmmm... luscious, luscious cheese. I had some sort of Texan enchilada with sides of garlic-cheese grits and red beans & rice. At one point my poor abused stomach tried to reach up through my neck and throttle my brain, but I mollified it with a couple of pints of a local Texan beer (Station 2? Number 2? Something with a "2" in it. Not as good as the Lone Pine I had been drinking in the Driskill bar, but certainly better than fucking Lone Star.)

I don't remember who all was at the lunch, but hopefully some of them will chime in here. I do remember Susan Bays, Greg Beal, Ronaldinho, Brett N, Dannyboy, Brian Anderson, Bryan Naegele, James, Jojo, Heather Hale, big-Jon-who-I-met-the-first-night, David (who is the brother of big-Jon-who-I-met-the-first-night, and who is also pretty fucking huge), Chris White, Ann Daman, Holly Wonder, Julie O, Tina, Maria, and a few folks I didn't recognize.

Unfortunately, I didn't get to speak with a lot of these folks, and so there are a few whom I can't introduce to you. However, I can say two words about:

-- Greg Beal is the Grand Poobah of the Nicholl Fellowship, and a long-time member of WP. A tall skinny dude with a shock of gray hair, he's actually a little intimidating until you remember how helpful and friendly he has been to dozens of writers breaking into the business.

-- Have I mentioned Ronaldinho yet? I've dubbed him "Thread Killer" on WP because his posts are so articulate and levelheaded and complete that there's really no reason to post anything on a thread after he's weighed in. The bastard. At the time, all he knew was that he was a Nicholl finalist ... since then, of course, he's learned that he's a member of the Fellowship. As soon as he finds the dwarves and elves and hobbits, I expect he'll set out on a quest and save us all from some nasty fate.

-- Heather Hale is an Emmy-winning TV writer/producer, the founder and operator of www.TheIndustry.la, and The Queen of Networking. She manages to schmooze without being at all schmoozy, if you get what I mean.

-- Holly Wonder is a wonder. That's her real last name, too -- her grandfather (or maybe great-grandfather) was a con-man who changed his name to Wonder. How cool is that?

-- How do you solve a problem like Maria? Well, first you start by not singing tunes from West Side Story at her. A slender Hawaiian who says "mahalo" in a way that makes your knees go a just little bit wobbly.

With such a big group, it took a while for all of us to get our grub, and so therefore we had to hurry out of the place since Panelists Wait For No Man. With a digestive system full of fat, carbs, and alcohol (and therefore prone to nod off like a narcoleptic reading a bad coming-of-age drama spec written by a first-time screenwriter who really wants to write novels), I rushed to get to my next function -- a round table for "second rounders" (people who got to the second round in the screenplay competition).

(They considered calling us "Those Who Don't Totally Suck But Aren't Nearly Good Enough To Be Semifinalists," but apparently that wouldn't fit on the name badges.)

Next: My First Round Table ("Where the fuck did I leave Excalibur?")

SoCal Film Group | Austin Film Festival | Screenwriting | Digital Filmmaking | Steve Barr